Portstewart Girls Brigade Excel at Badminton

Dec 19, 2023

by Skye

Just to start things off, I did NOT want to write this. This is only happening because of a series of very unfortunate events in which I made one joke about writing this thing and-oops!- now I actually have to. The moral of the story? Don’t make jokes in a car full of GB leaders, or else you’ll end up writing a newspaper article when you know nothing about writing newspaper articles.

Anyway, you’re probably here to read about that big badminton match we went to; and I’m going to tell you about it from my perspective! What a shocker.

It all began in my house, where I, who knows about as much about badminton as a toddler does about engineering, was about to go to play in a badminton competition. Scary stuff! I was trying not to worry about it too much, you know, just doing things to calm me down. That was when my mum called me down and gave me the worst news of the day; even worse than having to go to school that morning, even worse than reminding me of my physics exam the following week for the TWENTIETH TIME.

I had to put my hair up.

To you, this may seem normal. But not for me. You see, when I put my hair up I tend to look a little bald, especially in photos. And, of course, there is nothing wrong with being bald, but with my facial structure I tend to look more like I’ll be marching in the troops instead of the Girls Brigade. And so, after a back and forth argument over whether I looked like an egg in photos from the age of 3-13, we settled on some pigtails that made me look like I had just leapt out of High School Musical.

I had to put my hair up.

To you, this may seem normal. But not for me. You see, when I put my hair up I tend to look a little bald, especially in photos. And, of course, there is nothing wrong with being bald, but with my facial structure I tend to look more like I’ll be marching in the troops instead of the Girls Brigade. And so, after a back and forth argument over whether I looked like an egg in photos from the age of 3-13, we settled on some pigtails that made me look like I had just leapt out of High School Musical.

That’s when the car pulled up outside. I grabbed my bag, walked out and questioned every decision that got me to this point.

The first bad event of that evening happened in that very car. For some reason I’d put my seatbelt on while also wearing my bag, which led to me spending the entire journey with the mass of two people under one seatbelt. It was thoroughly uncomfortable.

Eventually we made it to the competition, and once we entered the hall where it was taking place I felt like I’d been swept up by a tsunami of girls, all wearing GB hoodies. Our group was actually the odd one out, only two of us were wearing our hoodies (including me, so haha). Anyway, we had to wait for ages for the thing to actually start, cause they had to go over all the boring stuff like rules and whatever.

And then began what I ever-so-fondly call the ‘Sitting and eating oranges phase’.

It’s kinda in the name, really. We just sat for about half an hour talking and eating Jaffa Cakes and Oranges- though, the oranges were SO GOOD. They were the perfect water to orange ratio, I’d honestly recommend! Oranges aside, we finally ended up playing. I was on Team A (Amazing, Awesome, Actually the best at the game), and the other two were on Team B (Bad, Beastly, BADminton- kidding don’t attack me guys pleaseee!!).

Team A went first, and the game went as you’d expect. We won! I’ll skip most of it cause it wasn’t really interesting.

…Until the 2nd game. We went on, figuring the game would go as normal, but about halfway through the match my teammate HIT A GIRL IN THE EYE WITH THE SHUTTLECOCK. It was a little funny, only a little. And we won that game so, you know, all’s well that ends well.

The 3rd game wasn’t as good though. Apparently the finalists were actually really good at the game, and I was horrible at it, they figured out that I wasn’t as good and you can guess where it went from there…we lost.

WE GOT SECOND THOUGH!!

And maybe we didn’t win, but you know what they say! First is the worst, second is the best, third is the one with the hairy chest.

And second gets McDonald’s on the way home.